From Behavior to Belonging: How ABA Therapy Fosters Social Growth

Autistic boy covering his ears.

Applied Behavior Analysis, better known as ABA therapy, has gained widespread recognition for helping individuals with autism and other developmental challenges improve their behaviors and learn valuable life skills. However, beyond simply changing behaviors, ABA therapy plays a powerful role in fostering social growth.

Social connections are vital for all of us. For individuals with autism, building these connections can be more difficult. ABA therapy helps bridge that gap, guiding individuals from focusing solely on behavior to finding a sense of belonging within their communities.

In this article, we’ll explore how ABA therapy services go beyond behavior management to support social growth, helping individuals connect with others, build relationships, and feel like they truly belong.

What Is ABA Therapy?

ABA therapy is a science-based approach to understanding and improving behavior. It’s commonly used to help children and adults with autism, but it can benefit anyone who struggles with behavior, communication, or social skills. The basic idea of ABA therapy is to break down complex behaviors into smaller, more manageable steps and reinforce positive behaviors through rewards and encouragement. This structured approach helps individuals learn essential skills that can improve their quality of life.

While ABA therapy is often associated with managing behaviors like tantrums, aggression, or difficulty following directions, its impact goes much deeper. ABA therapy also helps individuals develop important social skills, which are key to forming relationships, participating in group activities, and feeling connected to others.

The Importance of Social Skills

Social skills are the foundation of how we interact with the world around us. They help us communicate with others, understand social cues, and build relationships. For individuals with autism, social interactions can be challenging. They might struggle with understanding facial expressions, knowing how to start or maintain a conversation, or recognizing the unspoken rules of social situations. These difficulties can lead to feelings of isolation and make it harder to form meaningful connections with others.

This is where ABA therapy comes in. By focusing on teaching social skills in a step-by-step manner, ABA therapy helps individuals gradually improve their ability to interact with others. Over time, these small improvements add up, leading to more confident, fulfilling social experiences and a stronger sense of belonging.

Teaching Social Skills in ABA Therapy

ABA therapy services are highly individualized, which means the social skills taught during therapy are tailored to meet each person’s unique needs and abilities. Some individuals may need help with basic skills like making eye contact or understanding personal space, while others might be working on more advanced skills like making friends or resolving conflicts.

Here are some of the key social skills that ABA therapy helps individuals develop:

1. Eye Contact and Body Language

Making eye contact is a basic yet crucial social skill. For many individuals with autism, maintaining eye contact can feel uncomfortable or overwhelming. ABA therapy helps individuals practice making eye contact in a way that feels natural and comfortable. Therapists may start with short, simple exercises, like encouraging a child to briefly look at someone’s face while asking for help. Over time, this skill can be strengthened and become more automatic.

Similarly, body language is another key part of social communication. ABA therapy helps individuals learn how to use gestures, facial expressions, and posture to communicate effectively with others. For example, a therapist might teach a child to nod or shake their head in response to a question or to use hand gestures to express their needs.

2. Taking Turns and Sharing

Taking turns and sharing are essential social skills, especially for young children. Whether playing a game, talking to a friend, or working on a group project, knowing how to take turns and share with others is crucial for positive social interactions.

ABA therapy often incorporates games and activities that encourage turn-taking and sharing. For example, during a game of catch or while building with blocks, the therapist might prompt the child to wait for their turn and praise them when they successfully share with a peer. This type of practice helps reinforce the idea that taking turns and sharing lead to positive outcomes, such as making friends or enjoying playtime together.

3. Starting and Maintaining Conversations

For individuals with autism, starting and maintaining conversations can be one of the most challenging social skills to master. ABA therapy breaks this process down into smaller, easier steps. For example, a therapist might first teach a child how to greet someone with a simple “hello” or how to ask someone a question like “What’s your favorite game?”

As the child becomes more comfortable with these basic skills, they can work on more complex conversation techniques, such as asking follow-up questions or making comments related to what the other person has said. Over time, these small steps lead to more natural, flowing conversations that help build connections with others.

4. Understanding and Expressing Emotions

Emotions play a big role in social interactions, but many individuals with autism find it difficult to recognize and respond to their own emotions or the emotions of others. ABA therapy helps individuals learn how to identify different emotions—such as happiness, sadness, anger, or fear—and how to express their own emotions in appropriate ways.

For example, a therapist might use visual aids like picture cards to help a child understand what different emotions look like on someone’s face. They might also teach the child how to communicate their own feelings, such as saying, “I’m feeling angry” or “I need a break.” This understanding of emotions is key to building empathy and forming stronger social connections.

Fostering Social Growth in Everyday Life

One of the most important aspects of ABA therapy is that it doesn’t just happen in a therapy room—it extends into everyday life. The social skills learned during ABA therapy sessions are meant to be practiced and applied in real-world settings, such as at school, during playdates, or while spending time with family.

Here’s how ABA therapy fosters social growth outside of therapy sessions:

1. Natural Environment Teaching (NET)

Natural Environment Teaching (NET) is a technique used in ABA therapy that focuses on teaching skills in the places where they are naturally used. Instead of teaching social skills only in a clinic, therapists work with individuals in their home, school, or community. This allows the individual to practice their social skills in real-life situations, making it more likely that they will use these skills in their everyday interactions.

For example, a child might practice greeting a classmate at school or asking a teacher for help during class. By practicing these skills in the natural environment, the child learns how to navigate social situations more confidently and effectively.

2. Parent and Caregiver Involvement

Parents and caregivers play a vital role in fostering social growth. ABA therapy services often include parent training, where therapists teach parents how to support their child’s social development at home. This might involve practicing conversation skills during dinner, encouraging turn-taking during playtime, or helping the child recognize and respond to emotions during family interactions.

By involving parents and caregivers, ABA therapy ensures that social growth doesn’t stop when the therapy session ends. Instead, it becomes a continuous process that happens throughout the day, every day.

From Behavior to Belonging

Applied Behavior Analysis is more than just behavior modification—it’s about helping individuals feel like they belong. When individuals develop strong social skills, they’re able to form meaningful relationships, participate in group activities, and become part of their community. These social connections are essential for building confidence, self-esteem, and a sense of belonging.

By breaking down social skills into small, manageable steps and providing plenty of positive reinforcement, ABA therapy helps individuals move from focusing solely on their behaviors to becoming active participants in their social world. Over time, these small steps lead to big changes—changes that allow individuals to form lasting friendships, navigate social situations with ease, and feel connected to the people around them.

Conclusion

ABA therapy services are an invaluable tool for helping individuals with autism develop essential social skills that lead to greater confidence and a stronger sense of belonging. By focusing on eye contact, conversation skills, emotional understanding, and more, ABA therapy fosters social growth that extends far beyond the therapy room and into everyday life. Through small, carefully guided steps, individuals move from behavior challenges to forming meaningful relationships, proving that social skills truly can transform lives.

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What to Expect During the First Month with Your Au Pair

Smiling child holding a block and playing

Welcoming an au pair into your home is an exciting step. They’ll be a new addition to your family, offering support and helping manage the busy routines of your household. But, like with any new arrangement, the first month can be a learning curve for everyone. There will be moments of adjustment, communication, and even some awkwardness.

However, it’s all part of the process of building a comfortable, trusting relationship.

Firstly, for those who have not heard of the term, what is an au pair? An au pair is a young person, typically from another country, who lives with a host family to provide childcare in exchange for room, board, and cultural exchange.

So, what should you expect in that first month with your au pair?

1. Setting the Tone with Clear Expectations

Once you’ve chosen an au pair from an agency, the first few weeks are crucial for establishing how things will work. Your au pair needs to understand what their duties are, and you’ll want to ensure that everyone is on the same page. Whether it’s managing school pick-ups, meal times, or bedtime routines, clear communication is your best friend.

Sit down with your au pair and go through their daily schedule, including your family’s values and habits. While it may feel like over-explaining, remember that they’re entering a new home and culture—details matter.

2. Cultural Exchange: Embracing Differences

An au pair isn’t just a babysitter—they’re part of a cultural exchange program. This means you’re both going to experience differences in habits, routines, and expectations. Maybe they’re from a country where meals are served at different times, or they follow certain traditions that you’re unfamiliar with. These cultural nuances can feel exciting but also unfamiliar.

Be patient. The first month is all about learning each other’s rhythms. Why not have a conversation about how things are done in your respective cultures? Not only will this help you understand each other better, but it’ll also foster a deeper connection. Encourage your au pair to share their culture with your children as well—this can be a fantastic learning experience for everyone.

3. Balancing Work and Personal Time

One of the trickiest areas to navigate is balancing the professional and personal relationship with your au pair. They’re not just an employee—they’re living in your home, sharing meals, and possibly attending family events. It’s a unique situation, and figuring out the boundaries is key.

While it’s important that they feel included and welcomed, it’s equally essential to respect their downtime. Your au pair has a lot of responsibilities is entitled to time off. Having clear boundaries between work hours and personal time will prevent any awkwardness. Encourage them to explore the area during their time off or connect with other au pairs.

At the same time, make sure they feel like part of the family during meals or other activities. This balance of work and personal connection can take time to get right, but that’s entirely normal in the first month.

4. Building a Relationship with the Kids

For your children, a new person living in the house might feel a bit strange at first. Some kids warm up quickly, while others might need a little time. Your au pair will be spending a significant amount of time with them, so this bond is crucial to everyone’s happiness.

Encourage your au pair to spend quality time with the kids in low-pressure settings. Whether it’s playing games, reading books, or simply hanging out, these early interactions will lay the foundation for a great relationship. You’ll likely see your children start to rely on and enjoy the au pair’s company as they get more comfortable.

But keep in mind, it’s not unusual for children to test boundaries, especially with someone new. Support your au pair by backing up their authority when necessary. This will help the children understand that the au pair is an adult who can guide them, and it will make things easier for your au pair, too.

5. Small Adjustments and Growing Pains

Let’s be honest—no matter how prepared you are, there will be bumps along the way. Maybe your au pair struggles with certain household tasks or misinterprets your expectations. This is normal. Remember, they are adjusting to a new culture, language, and family dynamic all at once. Mistakes will happen.

The key is to keep communication open. If something isn’t working, address it in a constructive manner. Similarly, encourage your au pair to voice any concerns they might have. This mutual exchange helps iron out any wrinkles early on, making things smoother in the long run.

Patience is everything. By the end of the first month, both you and your au pair will have learned a lot, and things will naturally start to feel more comfortable.

6. Getting into the Groove

By the end of the first month, the initial awkwardness should start to fade. You’ll have a better understanding of each other’s routines, and hopefully, your au pair will begin to feel like part of the family. At this point, their role should be clear, and everyone should have a good sense of how things operate on a day-to-day basis.

It’s also a good time to check in with your au pair. Ask them how they’re feeling about their role, what’s working, and if there’s anything that can be improved. This is a great opportunity to make any small tweaks before the routine becomes too set.

Final Thoughts

The first month with an au pair is a time of learning, growth, and adjustment—for everyone. While it might take a little time to find your rhythm, by focusing on open communication, respect, and understanding, you’ll set the foundation for a successful experience. As both you and your au pair settle into this new dynamic, the initial uncertainty will give way to a more natural and comfortable routine.

Don’t worry if things aren’t perfect right away. It’s all part of the process. Embrace the journey, and soon enough, your au pair will feel like an indispensable part of your family.


Read about positive steps that can be taken to nurture good behavior in young minds.

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3 Tips for Letting Your Kids Game Productively

Girl gaming while real life action figures fight in the background.

Ensuring that your kid’s gaming time doesn’t eat into their studying time can be particularly tricky. This is especially so in our modern world, in which games can be played on virtually every device, making it harder to set clear boundaries between fun and focus.

While educational math games are ideal for the classroom, your child will likely still want to spend a little time on Minecraft. There are some key ways you can ensure that your kid’s gaming can be a part of a healthy, productive relationship with the world around them, so let’s talk about that.

Create a positive feedback loop

A great way to ensure that your child obsessively thinks about gaming is to attempt to outright ban it in your home. Instead, consider what level of gaming you would think is healthy and appropriate, and create a positive feedback loop where they can engage to that degree.

For example, you might consider two hours with a ten-minute break in the middle to be a healthy approach to gaming. Instead of punishing your child when they don’t conform to that rule, celebrate them when they do. Perhaps offer them their favorite snack during that break time.

Be engaged with your child’s games

A child spending their time sealed off from the world around them is one that can develop quite an unhealthy relationship with both games in general, and the people in their life. A great way to bridge this gap is to become interested and engaged in the games your child is playing.

While this might be a little tricky if you’re not a gamer yourself, you can follow some simple rules to engage well. For instance, ask an open-ended question about a character in the game, and allow your child to talk as much as they want. You could also sit with your child while they game, and point out some tips and tricks.

Engaging with their hobby will help them to understand that you want to be a part of their life. With time and patience, the two of you can build up a relationship over this complex part of our world.

Little boy throwing large ball to big brother.

Create a balanced rule system

While a hard and fast rule system may have worked in the past, it may not be ideal in your home. Over time, kids will become more aware of the relative fairness in the world around them. Therefore, insisting on an arbitrary gaming time limit while not stopping anything yourself might seem frustrating to them.

Instead, consider creating and visibly sharing a rule where both you and your child have to stop doing something. Your child has to stop gaming for a little while, and you, perhaps, have to put your phone down. During this time, perhaps you could reconnect a little, make dinner, or do a fun activity together. Since you’re both giving something up for a time, the rule can be more equitable and approachable to a child.

While gaming can be a great source of learning and development, it’s not something that people typically want their kids to do all the time. With a little time, and the tips outlined above, you can manage your child’s relationship to gaming effectively to create a fair and productive household.

Related Reading

Learn how to keep kids safe while playing video games.

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Exploring Instagram’s New Teen Accounts for Ages 13 – 17

Teen girl holding large phone.

Meta, the umbrella company for a variety of popular products, such as Facebook, Instagram, Threads, and WhatsApp, has just implemented their latest effort in responding to government and public pressure to protect their users online.

The latest development is a bold one.  As of September 17th, Instagram’s teen accounts are now in effect for anyone between the ages of 13 and 17.  Children at ages up to 12 have long been protected, not just on social media but in any online setting.  See COPPA (USA) and GDRP (EU), as well as data protection laws worldwide.  

Until now, teens on Instagram were treated the same way as adults. With the new teen accounts, privacy settings are on by default to protect against unwanted interactions.  Sensitive content will also be blocked, direct messaging will be better restricted, and parents have more control over their child’s digital experience.

To combat against teens who may lie about their age to operate an adult account, Instagram will require age verification in more instances and ban any user who is caught.

So, what is the nitty gritty of all this?  Let’s break it down.

Teen Accounts on Instagram

Privacy is the key component that drives this new focus on protecting teens on Instagram.  So, we’ll begin with that point, followed by exploring the other new features of teen accounts.

Stricter Privacy for New Users

The default setting for any new account will default to private. From the get-go of signing up for a new account, teens will only be able to interact with people they already follow.

For teens who already have adult accounts, Instagram will send notifications prompting them to switch to private. Over the upcoming months, existing accounts will automatically migrate over to teens accounts for anyone aged 13 to 17.

Direct Messaging

Direct messaging settings will be stricter.  Teens will only receive messages from people they follow. This aims to prevent inappropriate communication, not just from adults but also from peers they aren’t connected with.

By limiting messaging access, Instagram strives to ensure a safer and more controlled communication environment.

Content Filtering

Instagram’s new content filtering mechanisms will further protect teens by hiding sensitive material. Specific search terms will be blocked.  This includes topics related to self-harm and eating disorders, even if it’s posted by someone they follow.

Basically, the aim is to prevent exposure to harmful content that could negatively affect mental health. Meta has been working with mental health experts to fine-tune these filters to ensure age-appropriate content for younger users. Additionally, teens will be directed to mental health resources.

This added layer of protection will be especially reassuring for parents worried about the kind of content their children might stumble upon while using the app.

Enhanced Tools for Parents

Parents are also going to get enhanced tools to supervise their teens’ activity. Instagram’s parental supervision features now allow parents to set limits on screen time, block the app during certain hours, and even approve or deny changes to their teen’s privacy settings.

For instance, if a teen wants to switch their account from private to public, parents will be notified and can make the final call. These updates are part of Meta’s broader effort to promote healthier digital habits and ensure that teens can navigate online spaces more safely.

Further Measures to Promote Mental Health

Overall mental health for children and teens is another big push behind new laws and policies being implemented across all social media platform.  So, in addition to what we’ve already highlighted regarding Instagram’s teen accounts, here are a few other things they are implementing.

Nudging Teens to Take Breaks

Instagram is expanding on its “nudge” features, which are prompts encouraging teens to take breaks from the app, particularly during late-night hours. These nudges are designed to promote healthier digital habits and mitigate the risk of social media overuse, which has been linked to negative mental health outcomes.

Time-Spent Monitoring

In addition to parental control tools, Instagram has introduced features that monitor time spent on the platform. Teens and parents can track how long the app is used each day, with Instagram pushing teens toward a balance of online and offline activities. Parents can set daily screen time limits, encouraging healthier social media consumption​.

Guided Conversations and Resources for Parents

Instagram’s new features are designed to foster better communication between parents and their teens. Alongside these changes, Meta has created resources to help guide conversations about responsible social media use. These resources provide tips on discussing digital safety and setting boundaries, allowing for ongoing parental engagement​.

Expansion Beyond Instagram

The effort to protect children and teens continues to evolve.  These new protective measures are also extending across all of Meta’s platforms, including Facebook.  Digital safety, mental health, and built-in controls for parents for minors under their care are the key components to ensuring a better co-existence between social media and interactions within the real world.

With pressure on Meta to do better by law makers, and all companies for that matter where privacy is concerned, as well as the advisory on social-media by the the U.S Surgeon General, it’s safe to say that the conversation around digital safety is far from over.

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